I Don't Belong to Any Country Anymore - Living In Between
Jana Vanana
Feb 28, 2026 13:00
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In this video, I talk openly about identity, language, trauma, healing and what it’s like to live in between cultures after leaving your home country for many years. I explain why I moved my channel from Czech to English, how much work really goes into one YouTube video, and why disappearing for long periods is often not about a lack of care, but about survival.
I share my complicated relationship with the Czech Republic, growing up poor, experiencing severe bullying, and how those experiences shaped my decision to leave and never look back. At the same time, I reflect on the quiet longing that appears once healing begins. Missing songbirds in a meadow, the smell of pine forests, and the strange feeling of returning somewhere where everyone speaks your language.
This video is not about blaming a country or people. It’s about how trauma attaches itself to places, languages and identities. It’s about living abroad for so long that you no longer fully belong anywhere, yet finding peace in that space in between.
If you have ever lived overseas, changed languages, lost your sense of home, or felt like you don’t fully fit into one box anymore, this video is for you.
Thank you to everyone who watches, comments, and especially to those who stay even when it requires subtitles. I see you, and I appreciate you more than you know.
#identity
#thirdculturekid
#livingabroad
#vanlife
#healingjourney
#childhoodtrauma
#expatlife
#belonging
#home
#languagelearning
#immigrantstory
#europeanaustralia
#selfreflection
#mentalhealth
#lifeabroad
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