You Were Let Go Because You Were Too Good
The School of Life
May 27, 2026 13:00
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When a relationship ends, our minds immediately turn to a relentless interrogation of our own character: Was I not funny enough? Was I too boring? Did I not listen well enough? We convince ourselves that we are fundamentally deficient. But this film explores a counter-intuitive, often uncomfortable truth: sometimes, we are rejected not because we are "too little," but because we are "too much." For someone raised on a diet of emotional neglect or trauma, kindness can be indigestible, and your steady, reliable love can feel like a threat to their survival. #Heartbreak #SelfWorth #Psychology Unlock all the content of The School of Life with a subscription to our podcast, articles, videos, and exercises, specially tailored to your needs.
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You can read more on this and other subjects in our articles, here: https://www.theschooloflife.com/article/maybe-you-really-were-too-good-for-them/
“It’s one of the harder ideas to take on board – if we’re modest and kind people, which we are, of course.
It feels sentimental and saccharine, something that someone brings out to lighten our mood (it’s perhaps been rather bad of late), not because it is true but because they want to cheer us up. We were let go… not because we are odd, not because we are unsavoury, not because we didn’t earn enough or don’t have the right sort of hair or skin or are bad in bed or snored or were a bit stupid or have questionable taste in clothes and music, but – magically – because we were, of all things… too good. Too kind, too thoughtful, too loyal. Too marvellous. Something about us was too amazing to bear; we were like a resplendent sun that can’t bear to be stared at....”
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CREDITS
Written and Narration:
Alain De Botton
Animation:
Diego Lodeiros
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